Rock N Roll Nerd - Tim Minchin.mp3

[00:00.000]He doesn't have a problem with drugs
[00:00.010]He just doesn't get them
[00:04.650]He's fine that his mates have tattoos
[00:07.750]But he thinks they'll regret them
[00:12.230]He likes going to pubs
[00:14.170]But he hates it when the music's too loud
[00:17.400]He tends not to go to rock concerts
[00:19.890]Cos he can't stand the crowd
[00:23.090]But all he's ever wanted to be
[00:26.570]Is a rock star on MTV
[00:30.110]But he knows that it's not ****ing likely
[00:33.300]He's in his mid thirtieth
[00:35.290]He knows that he will always be
[00:41.370]A rock 'n' roll nerd
[00:44.210]He'll keep writing songs the world will never hear
[00:48.490]And though they won't be heard
[00:50.480]He'll just keep writing
[00:53.510]Oh yeah
[00:55.260]But you see the problem is
[00:57.460]He always dreamt of being a star
[01:00.290]But he learned piano instead of guitar
[01:04.080]Which in the nineties didn't get you very far
[01:07.660]So while all the other kids were learning Stairway
[01:10.550]He was the piano to their forte
[01:13.790]But he was convinced one day
[01:16.180]He'd rock their ****ing asses
[01:19.160]And be an icon for the disenfranchised masses
[01:24.740]And grow his hair long
[01:26.530]And rebel against the state
[01:28.770]But just for now that'd have to wait
[01:31.060]Cos he's running late for his morning classes
[01:34.900]And he will always be
[01:37.650]A rock 'n' roll nerd
[01:40.530]He'll keep playing gigs that no one knows about
[01:44.520]And though it sounds absurd
[01:46.760]He'll just keep playing
[01:49.800]Oh yeah
[01:51.340]But you see the problem is
[01:53.880]There's not much depth in what he's singing
[01:56.870]He's a victim of his happy middle class upbringing
[02:01.640]So he can't write about the hood
[02:04.080]Or bling bling
[02:09.110]So he sits and imagines his girlfriend is dead
[02:12.560]To try and invoke some angst in his middle class head
[02:16.790]But the shit is always fine at half past nine
[02:19.690]When they go to bed
[02:21.230]And he's not spent a single night in prison
[02:24.270]He has no issues with nutrition
[02:27.860]He has no drinking problem
[02:30.150]And no drug addiction
[02:33.480]Unless you count the drugs they put in chicken
[02:38.810]And ****in' always tends to make him cough
[02:43.040]He doesn't look good with his t-shirt off
[02:45.380]And when he tries to act tough you can tell he's trickin'
[02:52.730]While his mates all go out late
[02:54.940]Popping pills and having fun
[02:57.380]He goes home and showers
[02:58.620]And gets a good eight hours
[03:00.330]He gets his thrills from his morning run
[03:02.460]And while his mates all go on dates
[03:05.200]Taking speed and drinking cans of Jim Beam
[03:07.780]He stays home and cooks
[03:09.030]Curls up with a book
[03:10.090]With the girl he's had since he was seventeen
[03:13.970]Cos he's never really been part of the scene
[03:16.410]Give him guns 'n' roses, he'll take Queen
[03:18.950]He's more into Beatles than The Stones
[03:21.340]He's more Stevie Wonder than Ramones
[03:24.020]And he's never owned a transit van
[03:26.420]He's never shot a Panterra fan
[03:28.860]He doesn't know the difference between metal and thrash
[03:31.300]He couldn't tell you nothing about Axl and Slash
[03:33.990]He likes Ben Folds to the Jackson Five
[03:36.280]He knows all the words to Staying Alive
[03:38.810]And though he tries to be all grungy and cool
[03:41.300]He spent eleven years in a mother****ing private school
[03:44.090]So it don't matter how he tries
[03:45.980]He cannot hide behind his rock 'n' roll lies
[03:48.680]Cos you've either got it or you don't
[03:51.120]You'll either rock it or you won't
[03:53.960]Yeah, you've either got it or you don't
[03:58.610]Yeah, you'll either rock it or you won't
[04:03.590]Yeah, you've either got it or you don't
[04:06.830]Either rock it or you won't
[04:09.210]You've either got it or you got it or you
[04:10.950]either rock it or you won't
[04:29.000]Yeah, you'll either rock it or you won't
[04:47.750]He knows that his music lacks depth
[04:52.100]But it just can't be helped
[04:55.340]He has nothing interesting to say
[04:58.820]So he writes about himself
[05:04.300]But he doesn't want to see himself obsessed
[05:07.340]So he writes in third person
[05:13.120]In an attempt to seem more rock 'n' roll
[05:15.260]But he suspects it's not workin'
[05:19.690]And deep in his heart he knows he
[05:23.540]That he'll never be Bono or Bowie
[05:27.370]And even if he was quite pretty
[05:30.510]With small pants like Kylie
[05:32.900]He knows that he
[05:35.990]Will always be
[05:40.910]A rock 'n' roll nerd
[05:43.910]He'll keep writing songs the world don't care about
[05:48.070]And though it sounds absurd
[05:50.460]He'll just keep writing
[05:53.710]Oh yeah
[05:56.350]You can criticise him
[05:59.480]But he won't care
[06:02.530]Cos he wants to rock, and he will never be deterred
[06:09.820]But he'll always be a ****ed up little,
[06:13.360]try-hard, wannabe rock 'n' roll nerd